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Posted September 30, 2010 by Mz.Candy

So, I am laying naked in bed and legs are apart and this hunk of a man slowly climbs on top of me and he says he is going to make love to me all night long. I am so, so excited and looking forward to this. Oh yes, yes and the Door bell rings! I open my eyes and realize that I was never going to finish this erotic dream. GOSH DAMNIT!
I wobble half asleep to the door and open it. I see my girlfriend standing there and it is like, 3am and this woman is in tears. She is a sister and I quickly get her in the house and grab her some tissues. I am wondering where “Jose” is at (Her ole’ man). – What’s the matter? What Happen? Where is Jose? Is he down? – No, she says through her tears, He left me on the side of the road. – WHAT? He left you on the side of the road? Why? – We got in an argument and he just left me there. – Umm, where is there? – He left me by the border in Tijuana. Now I am thinking how she got here. – How did you get 300 miles to here from Tijuana? – I hitched hike and got a ride from a trucker she says through her tears. I am thinking and getting angrier by the minute. – You’re too much of a wuss girl to be hitching a ride. – I know, I was so scared – she says, - but I had to do it. – My Gawd I am thinking. She lives like 900 miles away from here and I am shocked that Jose’ did that. WTF was he thinking leaving her at the US / Mexican border!

She calms down a bit and I ask her if she had eaten, and she said yeah. The trucker bought her a cheeseburger. So I get up and go into the closet and grab a pillow and blanket. – Here, use this on the couch and get some rest. We’ll talk about this shit in the morning. You gonna be alright? – Jesse (short for Jessica) smiles through her blood shot crying eyes. – Yeah I’ll be alright, Thank you Candy. – Well alright Jesse, g’nite. -

Jesse sits up from her slumber and sees me staring at her from the small kitchen table with a cup of coffee I have in my hand. – G’morning Sunshine! – I smile at her. She gives me a tired smile and says, - Good morning. – She slowly gets up and walks over to the coffee machine and pours herself a cup of coffee. Then she sits opposite of me at the table and starts to tell me what happened. I quickly stop her in mid sentence, - No, no I don’t want to know what happen. You know I am old school when it comes to that! I don’t fuckin want to know! – She looks at me and says, - Sorry – I smile, - No prob sweets, now as you know I am always one broke bitch and my phone works but there is no long distance. So, call the Operator and get a collect call going to your house. She tries to call and there is no answer. – Try your mother – She calls her mom and she starts telling her what happened. I exit the room so not to hear what is being said and got dressed. – Candy, my mom wants to talk to you please. – I walk back into the kitchen area and she hands me the phone. I start chatting away on the phone, I frowned and said okay to her mother and handed back the phone to Jesse and again, left the room and started to re-get dressed into the leathers. I walked back into the living room – You have any money on you? – She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a $20 bill. – That’s all I have. – Where is your purse? – On the bike in the saddle bags with Jose’. Now I am wondering, - How did you get that money you have? – The trucker gave it to me. – He what? Gave you $20? Hmmm what did ya do to earn that $20? – Umm, nothing, I didn’t do anything. – I looked into her eyes and can see she is lying to me. – All I want to know if you did something, I don’t care what it is, I just want to know if ya did something for the $20 bill? – She frowns, - Yeah, I did something. – I cut her off and said, - okay, gimme the $20 because we are going to need that to get you home. – She has this concerned look on her face – How am I getting home? – I am your ride home gurl! – You don’t have the money to ride all the way there and all the way back do you? – I shake my head, - No, I really don’t have the money to get home. We’ll worry about that when we cross that bridge. – What about your work? – I pause for a sec and think; - I might have to look for another job by the time I get back. - Oh Candy, I’m so sorry, maybe we can find another way. – No, I promised your mom I get you home personally and that is what I am going to do. Grab your jacket and let’s get going. We have a long day ahead of us. – She smiles and turns to the door and trips on the throw rug on the floor. Kaboom and she slowly roll’s over. I shake my head and reach out my hand and help her back to her feet. I shut down the house and grab the extra helmet for her. – Let go sweets. –
It was about 170 miles and my rear was going numb. It had been awhile since I was in conditioned for a road trip of 900 miles. So I saw that I needed gas and it was a good enough excuse for me to stop and give my ass a rest.
I pulled up to the pump and told Jesse to get off the bike. She stepped up and stepped off and I watch her lose her balance. Plop right on her ass next to my bike. I put the kick stand down and got off the bike, reached out and helped her back up. She looked at me, - Not use to your bike - I smiled but didn't say anything. She dusted herself off and went to the restroom. I got the gas and pulled the bike over to a park bench and had my soda and a cig. We didn't talk much, I knew she had a lot on her mind and I can respect that. I don't know why Jose' keeps her in the so called closet when it comes to the biker Lifestyle. Their relationship started okay a few years ago. I feel kinda partly to blame cuz I introduced them to each other. I can see it was a mistake and it was getting worse by the day. Now I am in the middle of it.

We got on the bike and headed down the road. Hours had passed, fill ups had come and gone and I was getting hungry. I half looked behind me, - You getting hungry back there? - She lean up to my ear, - Yeah, I was hungry hours ago. - What? Well shit lady why didnt you say sumthang? - I didn't want to bother you. - Bother me? BOTHER ME? She comes banging on my door at 3am, I was making love to this hunk of a man and now she is concerned about bothering me? I lean back, - I'll find us a place to eat - Great - She said.

I found this burger stand and we ate outside on the tables they had provided. Too many Yuppies inside the joint staring at us like we came from the freakin circus. I looked at her and she was in deep thought, - You okay? - Yeah I guess I'm okay, just don't know why he left me there stranded and no money, no nothing. - I shook my head, - I don't wanna know why you two were at the Mexican Border in the first place 1,200 miles from home. I know Jose' and thats why I don't wanna know. - She started to talk, - Well - No, no I said I don't wanna know. - We finished up the burgers, fries and soda and we needed to go again. Jesse stands up to drop the burger bag in the trash and she stumbles. I catch her and hold her up. Now I am thinking, this woman is either awfully tired or a total clutz! - You okay? - Yeah, thanx Candy -
8 hours later and plenty of gas stops, we were starting our run over the Golden Gate Bridge and I love riding over that bridge. Kinda romantic/cool thingy and I get a charge out of it. I can see for miles and miles in both directions! Damn we are way up here and that water seems like miles away down below.

The weather was great and we are coming into Sausalito which is on the other side of the Golden Gate. I noticed that there are a lot of Seagulls flying around overhead on the freeway. Hmmm.
One bird caught my attention and as I was following the road I was also watching this bird. We saw eye to eye and I had this weird feeling about this. Just then the damn bird takes a poop right in mid flight. OMG That stuff is coming right for me, I tried to speed up and yell behind me, - INCOMING - Jesse leans up, - What? What did you say? - You know over the years I have seen our military fighting over seas in Iraq and other places and they talk about these Smart Bombs and how they can get within a few feet of their target. Well, I have found that Seagull Smart Poop is even more accurate than a high tech smart bombs. That bird took into the calculations of my speed, wind speed, wind direction, drop rate and one un-suspecting victim. Smart Poop has no errors and this bird brain did it without a calculator. Smart Poop is deadly and extremely accurate. I think the Pentagon needs to look into Seagull Smart Poop. Anyway, I hear behind me, - EWWW! - Maybe I shouldnt have ducked when it came whistling down at me. I slowly look behind me and I see this very white gooey face. OMG, That wasn't only a very Smart Poop, but a Helmet Buster Smart Poop Bomb! I saw a Off ramp and headed for it. Around the corner and we were in a gas station. I pull up to a wall and she gets off and stumbles and falls. This time though she didn't try getting up. I killed the engine and put the kick stand down. I get off the bike and looked at her. By now she was throwing up. I patted her on the back lightly and went into the mini mart and grabbed a bunch of napkins and a couple sodas. I watched her throw up the burgers we had about an hour before. Damn, she is gonna be hungry again soon. She gave me the white splattered helmet and she went into the the station restroom.
Would you look at this. Massive Collateral Splat patterns. Yeah, the Pentagon should look into this Seagull Smart Poop bombs thingy.
I got the helmet cleaned and she walked back out. - Hey gurl, you okay? - Yeah, I just got sick from it being in my mouth. - OMG, she actually had that in her mouth. I hand her a soda to wash any after taste down. This poor gurl is not having a good day.
She looked pale but was ready to continue our ride. We had another 4oo miles to go. This was going to be a 12 hour day of riding.
It was starting to get dark and I just finished getting another tank of gas. When I felt a slam into my helmet from behind. I look behind me and could see she was asleep. Her head was just bobbing around and smacking my helmet. I'll let this go for the time being. She had to be exhausted and what an adventure she had from the border.

We kept rolling on the miles into the dark hours we went. Finally hour 13 and 950 miles later we arrived at her mom's home in Crescent City, CA. Well actually just outside the city limits where her mom and dad had a small working farm.

Her parents were really happy to see her home. I smiled and lit a cig on the front porch. Her dad came out to greet me and smoke his pipe. - How ya doin Ms. Candy? - I smiled at him and said, - Imma a bit tired, but doin good I think. How about you? - We continued to talk for a while and he threw me a cold beer. Mom was fixin some late night supper for us. We didn't stop for dinner and she lost her lunch at the gas station.

Jesse walked up from coming from the barn, - I got the blankets out on the hay and I rolled your bike into the barn. - Good I said, after dinner I think the sand man will be calling me pretty quick like. Too many hours on the road and not enough sleep. - She looked at me with grateful eyes, - We'll make sure you have enough money to get home and cover your round trip. - I smiled at her, - Imma not worried sister, Life is too damn short to worry about tomorrow right now.

After dinner and another beer, I decided it was time to call it a night. I didnt want to sleep on the couch, so they made a bed for me in the Barn. I walked in there and turned the light on. Threw the bed roll out and played with their dog that runs loose around the farm.
I said my prayers to the great father for getting us here safe and sound and I had my last sip of beer from the empty bottle and I turned off the light.
I laid on the bed and used the mexican blanket as my pillow. I started to slowly fade off and was going to sleep. What a day. In my dazed mode I could see myself naked on the bed with my legs slightly apart and this hunk of a man climbing on top of me and saying, that he was going to make love to me all night long. I am so excited and looking forward to this. Yay! No door bells. His lips start to kiss my neck .....

Tags: biker chicks, nudity, wild women, bikers, riding

Yellowstone adventure aka when it rains it pours

Posted August 25, 2010 by roger and sharon

Yellowstone Adventure August 2010

We found ourselves with an unexpected 4 days off in a row. Because of inventory at work Roger ended up with a Thursday/Friday off from one week followed with a Saturday/Sunday off in the next week. So with Thursday through Sunday off we decided to have an adventure. The weather forecast showed 90+ weather coming up with no chance of rain so it was on.

Roger had too much overtime so “had” to get off work at noon on Wednesday. Headed home and ready to head out early and get a little bit of a head start on our travels. Sharon wasn't quite expecting that so we had a few preparations that still needed done. Of course Roger didn't help with any of the packing or getting ready because he was being lazy and putting things off until the last minute. So Sharon finished washing the bike and packing the last minute things. Roger got a little rope and tied all our garbage to the back of the bike.

It looked pretty much like this.. except since it was 90+ degrees out we didn't bother to put a garbage bag over out stuff on the back. We arranged for Lee to stay with friends and headed out for our adventure. Our first stop.. Wal-Mart. We bought the black bag for the front of the bike to hold a few extras and some cinch sack garbage bags to cover our goodies.. just in case it happened to rain along the way. No worries about rain because the forecast showed no rain in the forecast and no clouds.. so it should be smooth sailing!

We left home some time after 2.. hit wally world and picked up the bag and the garbage bags.. just in case. Loaded them up and hit the road. Beautiful ride through Idaho and into Montana. Sharon had never been to Montana before so got to add a new state to her life history when we hit the top of the pass. It was warm sunny and dry.. the ride was perfect! We crossed the continental divide and were heading down the Eastern side when we noticed that water runs out of the freeway cracks.. that creates a slick surface to beware of around corners and even in the straight sections so we took it easy. Near the bottom of the pass we came upon an accident where a motorcycle had run off the left side of the road and struck the end of a guard rail. The ambulance was sitting on scene and police were just standing around. Not a good sign because the patient was not being transported and the accident was a major wreck. We stopped at a rest area about a hundred miles into Montana and chatted a little bit with some other bikers that were there. Apparently one of the Banditos motorcycle club had gone into a high speed wobble and struck the end of the guard rail. The other members of the club had been back to the site of the accident and it did not sound good. We took the time to stop here and put the garbage bags over our gear on the back because we had a few moments without rain.. and the top of the payload, consisting of the sleeping bag, tent, and air mattress has slipped off towards the back of our main bag. By this point in the trip Sharon was beginning to think Montana only had one river.. the Clark Fork. Because every bridge we came to crossed it.

We took a rest and headed down the road. There happened to be a state campground at the rest stop so checked with Sharon to see if she wanted to stay for the night at the campground. It was still daylight and no rain at the moment. She felt like she could push on and it was ok with me so we went for it. On the next exit we had to pull off and retie our load because all our stuff was falling off the top again. We got to see a deer wander across a gravel pit as dawn fell upon us. We got our load tied right and hit the road to find a campground. By now it was darkish and the rain had caught up to us but we pushed on. Somewhere about 120 miles into Montana we spotted a sign that there was an RV park. So we decided to call it a night and find it. We rode along a side road, confused and looking for the elusive RV park. After a couple of loops and U-turns we found it... Closed and full for the evening. So we hit the freeway in search of a place to stay. That last state campground was looking pretty good by now! We pulled of at one exit because there was a state park.. picked up some over priced yellow glasses for Roger because his dark sunglasses suck in the dark and rain. No camping available at that park so we headed back to the freeway.

We came upon a tuck parking area along the freeway and pulled over... a couple passes through it in the dark revealed the lack of any no camping signs so it was on! There was a pit toilet and a flat space to throw a tent up so we did. Stumbling through the dark we discovered there were sidewalks and flat concrete surfaces in the flat spots! So we set up the luv shack mini tent on one of the concrete flat spots. No worries because we have a great big air mattress for comfort. Set up the tent in the dark and took turns blowing up the air mattress... ahhh.. life is good because it was only sprinkling lightly and we found a FREE space for the nite!! We packed light and have the air mattress below us and one thin sleeping bag to cover us. We snuggled in for a good nite sleep and life was good. Until the air mattress leaked air. Not long after snuggling in we hit the ground and were laying on concrete. We tried to pretend it was not happening and attempted to sleep. It did not work very well. Probably around 3 or 4 in the morning Roger decided that sleep was futile reinflation was necessary. So he blew the air mattress back up to get the butts off the ground. It worked.. we got a couple hours sleep before waking up for the morning!!

It was damp but not raining in the morning when we decided to get up and hit the road. The air mattress went into the garbage can we loaded up for the next leg of the trip. A lady heading to the pit toilet offered up some coffee and Sharon could not have been happier! That is what last picture shows... life is good!!! We are a few hundred miles ahead of schedule and still ready to take on this adventure!

We hit the road, with coffee in the system and no rain on our backs. The next leg was warm and dry. Folks on the freeway were traveling fast and it was the first time we had cruised with the speedometer in triple digits.. no pictures so you nor law enforcement can not prove it. One thing we can attest to is that the bike will still get 40mpg at 100mph. We cruised to the next exit that had a mcdonalds and stopped for breakfast. Oh yea, and about 5 miles past the truck parking area was a state park we could have stayed at.. but what the heck.. we camped for free!

We got to Deer Lodge where the Mt. State prison is and an automotive museum so we hit the exit to become tourists. The State prison was on Ghost Hunters and they decided it was haunted. The tour of the prison and auto museum was only 9 dollars each for a three day pass so we headed into the prison.

So we got some fuel and hit the road again... somewhere along the line we figured we would find an air mattress and a place to stay. Pretty uneventful across MT. We were going to visit Virginia City along the way but missed the exit and exits in MT are quite a ways apart. Next exit was the exit that headed to Yellowstone. We pulled off there and got some fuel.. Rested a bit and shared a power aide. Chatted with a couple guys that were coming back from Sturgis. They said there is a free place to stay about 7 miles past the buffalo chip that is called the drag pipes.. or something like that. They were headed back and were nice folks. We drank our power aid and headed for yellowstone.

Along the route we passed by where they were setting up for a concert series Rocking the river. It appeared to be a field full of RV's with a metal bridge there for no good reason. $60 a nite for the concert but something in the back of the mind because collective soul was scheduled for Saturday night. We went about 128 miles from I-90 till we hit West Yellowstone. Cruised on into town and made the left turn towards the park. Paid the $20 bucks for a motorcycle permit. That gave us 3 days access to the park. The only camping spaces that were available in the park were over 60 miles into the park and no guarantees there would be spaces available when we arrived. So we decided to hit a state park we passed just before coming to West Yellowstone. We flipped a u-turn in the park and headed back. When we got to the campground they told us that it was full.. but.. since we required no hookups and took up a very small space they would let us stay in one of the camp hosts spots that happened to be empty. Space 74 for $16 a nite was ours.

We gladly got the spot along with a bundle of firewood for another $6 from the campground hosts. We set up the luv shack and headed into town. In search of cheap air mattresses. The folks at the grocery store, where we bought a box of wine, some hot dogs and a three pronged skewer stick said we could try the local hardware store a few blocks to the NW and score a cheap air mattress. We gathered our booty and headed for the hardware store. We found a couple of cheap air mattresses and scored them. We also found a shot glass for Sharons token memento and had our bounty for the evening.

Headed back to our base camp to get ready for the evening. As we were figuring out how to inflate the air mattresses a couple of bikes pulled into the campground and were looking for a spot. The spot they had in mind was not really a spot but we told them it was cool with us if they wanted to set up in our space and the campground hosts let them. A couple of guys coming back from Sturgis.. One was 70 and probably on his last trip to sturgis and the other had just retired and it was his first visit. The older one had been to 13 in a row and probably would never make another one again. His friend was along and it was his first visit. The older guy rode a red and black valkrye and the younger one an older honda interstate. We cooked up our hot dogs and shared them along with our box of wine. Swapped riding stories and had an enjoyable time with these folks.

Crashed for the evening and found out that two air mattresses tend to spread apart during the night. Note to self.. if using two air mattresses.. duct tape them together. Our guests left before we staggered out of bed. One thing from the night before that stuck in the memory banks was that the old coot was running a car tire on his back wheel and he saw no performance differences but got a lot more miles per tire.... will have to look into that.

So we headed for jellystone park!! There were a few clouds but it wasn't raining so we were looking forward to a nice cruise in the park.

We had a nice cruise in the park for about 6 or 7 miles.. until we hit the traffic jam. We sat there.. looking at a rock hillside with an occasional marmot running around in it.. nice little river off to our right. Traffic going nowhere. After a nice long rest break traffic started moving. By that time a lot of folks had gotten out of their cars and passengers had walked forward in the lineup. So there were a few stops while people hopped in their cars. Once we got a ways ahead we found the source of the problem. A single buffalo. But at least Sharon got to see her first buffalo. We cruised on towards Old Faithful and stopped along the way at the paint pots. Went for a little walk around the walkway and got some nice pictures of mud and water.

We came upon another buffalo and stopped to watch it and get a picture just before we got to the paint pots.

Next stop Old Faithful. We made it there and made a quite necessary pit stop.. and some coffee for Sharon. Wandered over to the geyser and it had just finished its performance. So we had about an hour and a half till the next one. Wandered over to yellowstone lodge and what a beautiful building inside. Craftsmanship was beautiful and we were treated to a performance by a high school age group chamber orchestra. They played beautifully and the acoustics were perfect for it.

We wandered out back to old faithful and staked out a bench seat. One of the rangers was answering questions and had a coyote skin.. of course Sharon had to pet it. The weather was still good.. not too hot.. not too cold and it was quite relaxing. In the distance an occasional geyser would put on a little show for us to see. Sharon was able to reach down and touch the water coming from Old Faithful and was surprised that it was only luke warm.

The geyser started slowly and built up to give us a very nice show. As we were sitting there we people chatting in many different languages. French, Russian, Spanish, German, and a few asian languages. People from all around the world were there to take in the sights of the park.

We loaded up and headed for the waterfalls on the North East side of the park and that sounded like a really nice ride... for about 10 miles until the rain started. We quickly decided to detour back to camp because it was obviously monsoon season. We got back to camp soaked to the bone. Then it dawned on us that with our little bitty pup tent.. there is no place to put our gear to dry. So we shoved it down to the foot of our bed and decided it must be nap time. We napped quite a while and finally it was drying up outside. Of course by then it was dark too. So we snuck over to the firewood pile and obtained a bundle of firewood. Although the wood was quite dry... almost nothing would burn because it was so wet. We finally got it lit up and it burned with a low heat flame. It was nice to relax and stare into the flames before bed.

The next morning we awoke to mixed clouds and blue sky. We packed up camp and Sharon was desperate for a nice warm shower so we headed into the West Yellowstone laundrymat/shower. After finding out it costs 18 quarters for a shower Sharon promptly walked out because there was no way she was going to pay that much for a shower. That is my girl.

So we left yellowstone for our trek back home.

Our destination was now Virginia City. Not too far from yellowstone and barely out of the way we were thinking we might stay there the night and make it the rest of the way home on Sunday. We rolled into Virginia City and proceeded to wander up and down the wood sidewalks taking in all the sights and antiques. After peeking in all the windows we headed down to the train depot to see about riding the train over to Nevada City. Tickets were only $8 each but when we were told the next train was full and wouldn't be able to get on till 3:30. We decided to just drive the few miles to Nevada City and head out from there. Along the way we stopped at boot hill to visit the graves of the road agents who had been hung back in the 1800's.

The view from boot hill was beautiful even though you can't tell from this angle. But we could look down on all the old buildings and the train as it moved along the narrow gauge tracks. We loaded up again and headed for Nevada City. A brief tour there of an old style saloon and the other end of the railroad. Sharon got to go through the swinging doors of a tavern.

We headed down the road and thought we would probably ride to somewhere Missoula and hit a state campground there for the night. The weather was barely co-operating and we had one section where we were hit by a few light sprinkles. We decided to push on and stay the night at Cruisers in Stateline Idaho. Free camping and only another 90 miles till we are home on Sunday. We pushed on and when we gassed up at the 50,000 silver dollar bar we decided we were going to push on all the way to home because a shower and soft bed sounded pretty good even if we had to pull a late night getting home.

We rolled into home about 10:30 or so and our adventure had ended. We put on about 1150 miles, were sunburned and soggy but we had an adventure together.

And last but not least.. my favorite picture.. after a long days ride to yellowstone and a little too much sun.